What is emotional baggage? To put it simply, it consists of all the little (and big) things that happen to upset us every day.
It is not just the chewing out we received from our boss this morning, although that certainly is an emotional baggage. It is not just the argument we had with our spouse over breakfast, although that certainly is an emotional baggage. It is not just the dent in the rear fender we got when someone backed into us at the parking lot, although that certainly is an emotional baggage. Emotional baggage also includes the little things like spilling our coffee when we sat down at the table. Or, sleeping through the alarm and being late for work. Or, misplacing our glasses and not having them available when we needed them.
Only the bad stuff is considered by me to be baggage. All the good things like getting a hug (unless this upsets you) or getting a call from someone to wish you a happy birthday, is not baggage.
Why are such things important? Because, throughout the day all these little and not so little things pile up and we carry them around with us (baggage) and cannot fully relax and unwind at the end of the day. So, we end up taking our baggage to bed with us and cannot sleep soundly and therefore cannot get a fresh start the next day. Additionally, the baggage we pick up the next day adds to the load we are already carrying causing more emotional problems the consequences of which cause that pain in the neck or back or arm. You know the one I am referring to, the one we cannot figure out where it came from.
What can we do about this seemingly unending problem? There is a simple technique for unloading this emotional baggage that I normally give my clients to do as a self-help exercise especially if they are prone to carry such around with them.
1 — At the end of every day before going to bed find a place where you can be alone and won’t be interrupted, the bathroom is usually a good spot if you live with others unless you have children then it is catch as catch can since there is no place safe from them.
2 — Think back on your day starting at the beginning. Find every little (and big) thing that upset you that day, one at a time.
3 — For each of these emotional upsets say out loud (you don’t have to yell unless it makes you feel better – you can just whisper) these words,
- “This is something that happened and is in the past.
- It cannot be changed.
- I do not need to carry the burden of this with me.
- I am releasing it and I forgive the person (or myself) for the happening.
- (Wave your hand as though shooing a fly away from your face and say,) “Go away and bother me no more.”
Small and large emotional traumas that happen every day need to be dealt with so they do not cause us stress, tension, anxiety, confusion, etc. later when our conscious mind cannot recall them but that nagging little voice in the subconscious won’t let them go.
There are also things that have happened in the past which you may be able to recall if you try. And so, for the first few times you take this break at bedtime to unload, additionally try thinking back as far as you can beginning with your childhood and release those emotional upsets that still hold a place in your conscious memory (i.e. – when your favorite doll got broken or you got a spanking or you had a fight with your brother). Each time you do this exercise it is a good idea to check back like this because after finding and releasing things from childhood other smaller issues may show up later after the bigger issues are released. You want to remove as many as possible.
Warning: There will be other things that you won’t be able to remember that still stay with you and cause problems. These stem from such areas as genetics, societal consciousness and yes, even past lives whether you believe in such or not. These things can only be found by someone who is trained and experienced in detecting and correcting these types of problems. Many of the chronic problems we suffer from have this as a root cause like: allergies, colds, flu, COPD and etc.
The problems caused by emotional baggage are NEVER the same for any two people no matter if the outward symptoms are the same or not. This is why conventional western therapies do not work. You could spend years with counselors and psychologists talking about your problems and not get the results that I, or someone like me, can produce in just minutes.